I loved it. I was a young kid, just a few months removed from graduating from the School of Visual Arts and my Scholastic Illustrator contract had just ended. There I was sitting in the middle of a retail brand incubator with a slight bump in pay. I was feeling good about myself and I was only scratching the surface of that experience — because in walked Johnny.

Johnny was the “big gun,” the guy the owners would call in if they needed to blow a client’s socks off (which was often). He was fun to be around and we became friends. He appeared to be the archetype of the designer I wanted to be ever since my graduation. His client list was to be envied, and his work studied. To me he was part genius comedian, passionate advocate for beauty in design, and like many men that were mentors to me growing up, he did not “suffer for fools” easily. He worked a few stations over from me in the office and routinely, I would peer over at my big British soccer hooligan-looking workmate marveling, as he kept us in stitches with his most recent observation.

There were at least 10-12 of us including designers and production assistants who worked in that general area (not to mention the amazing retail buyers and merchandising consultants G+G had brought in) and we were a cast of characters. We all really liked each other for the most part, and I’d say there was definite team chemistry. It showed in the genuine delight people displayed when they saw you, and the general wackiness in the office. It also showed in the sporadic practical jokes that lightened the mood when a deadline neared.

I remember one incident in particular that was pretty hilarious in hindsight, but I was none too happy about at the time. I had one of those yellow-haired key chain trolls on my desk and I scanned it into the computer and made it into a big desktop wallpaper in order to mark my territory. This was a little unusual, because the freelancers technically could sit at any computer station they wanted. One day while I was at lunch some antics ensued. I returned to find someone had Photoshoped… um, let’s say “distinctive male parts” onto my desktop troll. As I turned beet red, everyone in the group snickered with delight. It was an interesting lesson in humility, to say the least.

I later learned that several co-workers were in on it, and to this day, Johnny will only cop to “I may have art directed some of it, lol!”

Eventually, the clients went away and our crew split up, but our friendship endured. Johnny is like a brother to me. Each time we speak, the words pick up from the previous conversation as if no time has passed. We have supported each other during up and down times, throughout multiple changes and various moves in our lives. Amidst all of that, one thing remains the same.

Johnny is still the “big gun” called in when a company needs to blow a client’s socks off.

John Carrington Simpson’s work speaks for itself, and can be viewed at Graff1.com.

I highlight their pain because it just doesn’t make sense to me that someone hasn’t developed tools to even the odds. Between Facebook, Twitter, Match.com, eHarmony, etc., somebody somewhere should be able to come up with some kind of data architecture, API, and license rules that allows everyone to share in a serious money making opportunity.

What I have in mind is a system that would distribute real-time statistical “singles” data based upon neighborhood or general location, enabling ladies (and men) to find love. A user could tap into this main “registry” app at their leisure and check out the prospects in the current area, view proximity to local attractions, industry districts (jobs data), and even filter for time of day.

This, of course, would be “weighted” in the context of the target gender. For example, say a group of women are walking around the city, and they end up in an office district after hours . We all know that there are  far less men around that area than during the day. However, this tool would theoretically help the women to find the after work spot that everybody goes to, or suggest alternative options. It would be like having a friend “in the know” or ”hunting at the zoo” (to borrow a friend’s phrase).

But on a serious note, if you’re wondering what sparked all of this, it started with this singles map. I think the map is fun to talk about partly because I’m married and I don’t have to deal with dating any more, and partly because the map has its detractors. It first appeared in National Geographic February 2007 and ever since, it has been an interesting conversation piece because of the conclusions it draws, plus I love information graphics.

There are resources like Yahoo Neighborhoods, MSN Real Estate, Kiplinger’s Best Cities, and Sperling’s Best Places. Those tools have their place, but I”m talking about something fun and hip with a slick user interface that singles can use on the go. I mean, it’s been three years later already!

I’m certain that I am not the first to think of this, so there must be an online service or geo-tracking mobile app that I don’t know about. It would be hard for me to believe some enterprising mind hasn’t been all over this.

List any Websites or apps in the comments if you know of any.

I’m sure there would be crazy privacy concerns and there’s also a risk that someone would try to skew the system for their own purposes, but it would be interesting to see it in action. I mean even on a generic level the data would be interesting.

Maybe we can re-define the word “hot spot” and come up with a system similar to the FON shared Wifi network and have single people register in their own neighborhood, anonymously if they choose to.

Come on, people work it out! I can’t think of everything. This situation presents a ripe opportunity for some angel fund investor.

Hang in there, ladies. I’m trying to support you by shining a light on this situation and hopefully answers are on the way. Maybe those boys over at Hot Potato can take a run at this one.

And fellas, if you’re reading this… Yes, I wrote this post to have an excuse to use that headline and use a picture of Beyonce… Later.

More Resources:

1. Online Dating Infographic via Mashable. Full of interesting statistics.

2. The New York Times attempts to demystify online dating.

3. Listio reviews a few Dating Applications.